I realized two things: you blink and a week goes by without you blogging, and I end almost all my blog posts with exclamation points.
This is going to be a departure from my usual highly informed, balanced, opinionated and intellectual articles, people, because I want to raise an alarm.
I’m trying to get into Pro Evolution Soccer 2008 on the PS2 and despite countless valiant attempts in three days of playing (albeit in bursts of about 1 hour each day), I have *NOT* been able to win a single match. A SINGLE MATCH. Not one.
I have not been playing video games for a while, I admit, preferring instead to do more mundane things like sterilizing baby bottles and filling up compartmentalized milk powder containers in my spare time. Occasionally I do different things like sending an email or five to various people in a strange place called ‘work’ (who can be quite persistent, I found) or when I decided to pay more attention to my personal projects, or indeed, deciding to (gasp!) read.
Despite all that, I remain, and always have been, a talent in gaming. In my heyday there are no games I could not master in minutes, and start clearing the field with petulant flicks of my wrist (or fingers, depending on what I was using at the time).
True, I may not kick ass in StarCraft, and some may recall with glee the occasional thumping I received at the hands of people who do nothing but play these games, but computer AI has never got me down for long.
Imagine my tension at being beaten repeatedly in PES2008. I simply cannot understand how a team whose name I can barely pronounce much less recognize can beat Barcelona (which has been renamed to something else due to licensing concerns, I imagine) by the ludicrous scoreline of 4-0. It came to a point where I didn’t know what the hell to do with the ball at my player’s feet! So I stand there, hands inert, player motionless, while I wait for a spark of inspiration. Which quickly turned into a spark of panic as the opposition nipped the ball from my player’s feet and going for goal.
This is crazy.
Mark my words: There is never a truer gauge for aging than your inability to play video games competently.
I will beat this game, if that’s the last thing I do. All while juggling PoP, baby, reading and learning in the spare time I have not working or sleeping. You know, piece of cake.
I seldom let my hair down and write about something as inconsequential as this how-my-day-went post, and I assure you that at least 5 blinks will go by before I succumb to such an impulse again.
I will return to regularly scheduled programming (I’m not a screenplay writer in Hollywood, so something as silly as union strikes will not hinder my writing, so you may relax, gentle readers), and serious thoughtful posts (for me, at least) will resume shortly.
And no I did not forget to write about books. Like George RR Martin, I too have indulgences in sport that I must, well, indulge in.